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.. ..
.||. ||.. ...
|| || || ||.||
`|.. || || `|.. ..|'''.| '|| || '||
'|' ' .... . .... ..||.. ... ..., || ....
|| '' .|| || || || || .| ' || .|...||
'|. | .|' || || || || || || || ||
''|...'| '|..'|' ||. ||. '|..' .||. '|..| ||. '|...'
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 1 Coin 8
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Welcome to what I hope will be a new era in the life of The Canticle. The
position of managing editor has changed again, with Flint taking over and
running things for me. With this change I hope we will finally have an issue
appearing on a regular, quarterly, basis. There are some new faces going the
Canticle family. Khrystina and Riverdance joining Flint, Rockman, Scarecrazy,
and Vanderbeck. A third person has also joined, Laggy, who will provide help
for people in her Dear Laggy column. Feel free to mail any of the staff, or
myself, if you have any questions, suggestions, or comments. You can also post
notes on the submission board in our office, by the humpback bridge.
-- Thaddeus
Editor-in-Chief
The Canticle
*-----------------------------------------------------------------------------*
<*> CANTICLE INDEX <*>
---------------------------------------+---------------------------------------
Introduction & Index .............. 1 | Dear Laggy ...................... 8-9
Editorials ....................... 2 | Zwr Interview Continued .......... 10
News ............................ 3-4 | Gossip ........................... 10
King Drin Interview ............... 5 | Horoscope's ................... 11-12
Zwr Interview ................... 6-7 | word Search ...................... 13
---------------------------------------+---------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER: Opinions expressed in The Canticle are not necessarily those of
the editor, Law, the AA Senate, or Mothers Against Rich Greyson's. Any person
who attempt to regard this material too seriously may be enthusiastically
mocked.
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page 2 8
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SCYTHE DEBATE RAGES
by Rockman
Scythers continue to debate the age-old question of what tastes better:
horsemeat, or elfmeat. Pitched battles between elfeaters ("Less Filling!") and
horseeaters ("Tastes Great!") have punctuated rowdy nights at the Clan Hut
recently.
One SKer, speaking on anonymity, said he enjoyed the lighter, fruitier taste
of the elf drumstick as opposed to the sinewy, chewy, horse's leg. This writer,
a horse afficionado, is afraid that one truly becomes what one eats. Rather
than be like an annoying little elf, I'd rather be tall like a horse, strong
like a horse, and there was something else "like a horse", but I can't recall
what that was.
THE SENATE PLAYS MUSICAL CHAIRS (and they say Admins have no fun!)
Over the past few months some changes have taken place amongst the admins
that govern Ancient Anguish. Paldin has taken up the duties of the Arch of
Balance again, after Pantheon resigned. The rangers of AA were last seen
fleeing into the woods, declining to comment. Toshina has also resigned as
Arch of Mudlib, returning the job to ArpeggiO, but not after improving the
state of the mudlib documentation significantly. Generations of wizards will
thank her and Malire for their tireless efforts. Arpeggio has been heard
mumbling about Toshina setting standards, but there is no doubt that he will
continue the good work she started. After a long retirement, Florin has
rejoined the admin team, this time to serve as Arch of Law. He's taken on a
really tough job, so let's wish him all the best! Flint has retired to the
bliss of running Trivia games, a well deserved rest! Our thanks to our
outgoing arches for their time, patience and efforts to improve this world of
ours.
~.~
Bored? Restless? Need to get out and sample the finer things before
your mind snaps from the tedium of everyday life? We've got the cure
for you! Drop into the Adventurer's guild and take a look around.
For the rough and ready Adventurer types, there's the old, reliable
Adventurer's Catboard. In the refurbished basement, you will find the
Poets Catboard, Joke Dogboard, and for you etheric travellers, the
Other Worlds Board. Have a look, something there may interest you, or
contribute to the conversation.
The Adventurer's Guild - Not just for Advancement any more!
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page 3 8
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Vandals Target Bust of King Drin
Vandals targeted a bust of King drin at the Tanallon Town Hall today.
The face was painted pink, and a rosary of potatoes strung around
its neck. The unidentified criminals also defaced the monument with the
inscription: 'Behold the King of Crud, or the Nepeth Potato Head.'.
Officials suspect the crime was committed by orcish troublemakers from
Dalair. An investigation is ongoing.
~.~
Three Bandits Raid Clothesline.
Three young bandits on ponies snatched several pairs of bright pink
bloomers from a clothesline yesterday. An irate woman filed a complaint
with Law about the trio, who fled towards the crossroads area. A spokesman
for Law says they have no motive for the theft, and no suspects.
~.~
Search Called Off For Missing Man.
A search for a missing Tantallon man was called off by the Royal Army
yesterday. The man, one Santos L. Helpar, went missing in the woods south
of Tantallon while gathering firewood. The search to date turned up no
signs of him. Official sources attribute the order to stop the search to
numerous attacks by giant owls and eagles, as well as marauding orcs, on
the searchers. The official went on to state: 'He is probably worm food now
anyways.'.
*Decker's Used Goods* We buy and sell! *Decker's Used Goods*
Have you just finished off some vile monster and find that you have alot of
equipment that you don't need? Just entered the realm and find that you need
stuff to keep you alive? We've got the solution! Come now: RUN! Don't walk!
To Decker's Used Goods! We have swords, knives, shields, armor, yes folks we
have ANYTHING you need! If we don't have it, you don't need it! And we're
SLASHING prices on all our stock!
You can find us just north of the Adventurers Guild... but you'd better
hurry or that special item you are looking for may be sold! Come in today!
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page 4 8
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New Fashion Trend In Hobbitat!
Yves St. Hobbitte has once again started a new fashion trend among the
elite of Hobbitat. 'No more stodgy leather trousers.' says Yves. 'Bright
pink boxers and bloomers are the way of the future.' According to Yves, the
pink accentuates the beautiful hairy feet of Hobbits. Frills and fringes are
optional. The new trend has even caught on with the Hobbitat Constabulary.
The Sherrif and 2 deupties were seen leading their ponies up the main street
wearing oversized pink bloomers over their armour and singing. Will this
trend catch on elsewhere? Only time, and good taste, will tell.
SUDIAN CLAIMS TRIVIA GOLD
Ancient Anguish's second biennial Trivia Tournament crowned Sudian as
the realm's new Trivia Champion. Simon won the silver medal and Rockman
won the bronze.
Change was in the air as none of the first tournament's medallists
(Fanboy, Eternity, Sully) entered this competition. Several pre-tournament
favourites such as Argeld, Ashyta, and Chulainn also missed out, either
arriving late, oversleeping, or being otherwise indisposed.
The tournament format saw two semifinals with the top five entrants in
each semifinal earning berths in the final. Rockman cruised to victory in
the first semifinal and Scarecrazy nipped Simon by two points in the second
semi. The final was a two-way race between Sudian and Simon through the
fifteenth of twenty rounds, whereupon Sudian claimed a healthy lead and
went on to glory.
Flint, longtime trivia gamemaster, is considering holding the tournament on
an annual basis should interest warrant, but while numbers of players at
recent "friendly" games have been high, tourney enrollment the second time
around was barely half what it was for the inaugural competition.
~.~
MEN! Tired of getting sand kicked in your face at Wide, sandy beach (s,w)?
WOMEN! Tired of being sexually harassed by those male orc Scyther pigs?
NEUTERS! Tired of listening to taunts for not having a definitive gender?
.-_-_-_-. Two weeks at Trough's Training Academy and you never need feel
| | inferior again! From the moment you enter after reboot, to the
| | | | |\ instant you leave before going to sleep, you will take comfort
|_|_|_|_|/ in the fact that you are prepared to enter combat at a moment's
\/ notice! Inquire at the Academy at the south harbour in Cardia.
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page 5 8
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King Drin: Lord of the realm
By Scarecrazy
This intrepid reporter scraped together all her courage, and went to
interview His August Majesty, King Drin Trueheart, The Orc Slayer.
Canticle: Greetings, your majesty.
King Drin: Are you here to plead your case?
Canticle: Nay, your majesty. I have come to interview thee for the Canticle,
a newspaper circulated within thy realm. Blood, sweat and many
tears go into the making of this publication. We perform tasks and
feats of heroism that goes beyond the limits of human endurance to
bring thee the latest news.
[King Drin scratched his beard thoughtfully.]
King Drin: Have you come to receive a noble title?
Canticle: Nay, your majesty! We ask for no reward! The only reward we doth
require is that of performing a service to the public.
King Drin: Although the peasants are nice, they complain too much.
Canticle: [Aside] Yes, I'm sure, your majesty. [To His August Majesty, King
Drin True... well, I'm sure you get the idea...] May I humbly
request permission to ask a few questions of thee, my liege? Thy
subjects are eager for word of thee. There has been considerable
concern regarding thy health in the realm, your majesty!
[King Drin adjusted his crown.]
King Drin: I still have it!
[This reporter had to duck, or else be beheaded by the mighty swing of Drin's
bastard sword.]
Canticle: In the long years of thy reign, which event dost thou recall most
clearly?
King Drin: Orcs! Kill them all, I say, kill them all!
[This reporter took the hint, and ended the interview here, after some profuse
thanks to the King.]
VISIT DALAIR'S FAMOUS TAVERNA
LIQUOR IN THE FRONT
POKER IN THE REAR
Home of the strongest tekillya
and stinkiest cigars anywhere.
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page 6 8
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Zwr - Top Player on Ancient Anguish
by Khrystina
Canticle: Tell me a little bit about yourself (ie, what race are you,
what class are you and what guild you are in).
Zwr says: Dwarf Ranger, and a member of the best guild there is, the
Knights of Drin. :)
Canticle: How did you first become part of the AA family?
Zwr says: I was just surfing the Internet & stumbled across the AA homepage
somehow...I have never played any other MUD (very much that is).
Canticle: Have you ever played any other classes or been in other guilds ?
Zwr says: I have played all of the classes and guilds a little, although I
have only reached level 19 with this charactar & one mage...I
have only been over 1 million exp with this character.
Canticle: Were you striving to be the best when you started ?
Zwr says: When I started, I was utterly clueless & was just trying to figure
out how to play. Hard as it may be to believe, I worked my
way up to level 19 killing nothing but lower level orcs & had no
idea untill then that higher level mosters gave more exp...it made
for a lot of guild points though. I probably started striving to be
the top player about a year ago. I still wouldn't say I am the
best,
I have just spent a lot of time.
Canticle: How long do you spend adventuring a day ?
Zwr says: I used to spend a large part of most days...recently, I think I
have been averaging about 2 hours a day...over the last two
months. It might be slightly more, but it is in that ballpark.
Canticle: What do you think other people think about you here ?
Zwr says: It depends on who you ask...I think that among the knights I am
well liked...In the Scythe I am generally disliked. I have friends
and enemies in all the guilds however.
Continued on next page.
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page 7 8
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(Continued from page 6.)
Canticle: Do you consider yourself to be a newbie helper? Team player?
Zwr says: Usually, if a Newbie asks me for help I will always give them help
in the form of information, and if I am not busy I will help them
get 15K exp or so...although I do not go out of my way looking
for newbies to help like some players do. I usually gather exp
alone,
not partying, although I do party some with my friends.
Canticle: Have you done any quests ?
Zwr says: I have done all the quests. :)
Canticle: Do you plan on becoming a wizard ?
Zwr says: Currently, I have no plans on becoming a wizard. I am perfectly
happy as the Elder Mortal of the Rose & top player on the list. It
is possible that at some time in the far distant future I might
become a wizard, but I have no plans in that direction.
Canticle: What do you think the hardest area is ? Your favorite ?
Zwr says: I would say that the most dangerous area is the Knight's
Stronghold, because of that guard upstairs outside of the proud
knight...hardest would be either the Knight's Stronghold or the
Lizardman town. My favourite is Star Caverns, because it
contains a very good set of uniques & is the area of choice for
gathering cash.
Canticle: What advice would you give to someone new starting out ?
Zwr says: The first piece of advice I would give a player starting out would
be to read all the help files. (It is surprising how many people
read no help files at all but just dive in.) The second piece of
advice would be to tell them to ask more experienced players
questions when they run intodifficulty...if I had done so I
would have found out basic things that otherwise took me months to
find out. (Such as how level 19 monsters gave more exp when you
killed them than level 1 monsters.)
Continued on page 10.
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page
8 8
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___ __ Are you an orphan between the ages of
The / _ \/ / 15 and 20 (humans; 24 & 30 Half-Elves;
| <_> < Commodities 75 & 145 Elves; 12 & 151 Orcs; 35 &
\___/\_\ Exchange 50 Dwarves)? Do you crave adventure?
W A N T S Y O U ! Excitement? A daily chance of death?
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Dear Laggy: Advice for Adventurers.
Dear Laggy,
I'm a ranger and I have a hard time finding a man who will put up with the moss
and twigs in my hair. Any suggestions?
-- The _Single_ Ranger Chick
Dear _Single_ Ranger Chick,
A ranger DUDE would have the same problems that you mentioned, however; if you
are speaking of the general male population then you have two choices. One,
wash and comb out the twigs, moss, etc. on a regular basis (the new herbs &
berry-extract shampoo is very effective). Two, make up an elaborate story about
the REASON why all that stuff is in your hair. Of course the story is up to
you! Have fun, and use one egg to add shine!
Laggy
Dear Laggy,
I have this problem with sweat. I mean; I walk around in the woods for only
five minutes some days and there is the awful smell radiating from ME!
Anyway; it's really annoying and there is no soap, so what can I do?
Sincerely, Smelly
Dear Smelly,
The wizards that be created a wonderful item known as perfume. If you can't
get rid of the smell, at least cover it up with something more delightful to
the senses since it bothers you so much. Contact your local ranger for more
information.
Laggy
Continued on Next Page.
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page 9 8
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Dear Laggy: Continued.
Dear Laggy,
My brother is a know-it-all. We have a bet; if I win, he has to give me
10k. The first part of the bet is that he says you won't print this letter; I
say you will. The second part of the bet is that I say wildrose dew is more
potent than a firebreather, but he doesn't agree. Who's right?
Abeau
Dear Abeau,
Your brother lost the first half of the bet, and you lost the second half.
Looks to me like you're even. Just so you'll know, wildrose dew is about the
same as a special.
Cheers, Laggy
Dear Laggy,
My new husband will not do anything around the house. What do I do? I want
LOTS of opinions!!!
---------Bride in Despair
Dear Readers,
Okay, you heard her; we need you to write in and give your opinions! Don't
spare any thoughts !
Laggy
___________
Well, that's it for this issue of the Canticle. I am always here to answer any
important (or even not so important) question you might have. Whether it be
love, luck, money. I am here ! Mail me at your local post office !
.o()o. Magical tools for Adventurers .o()o.
At Maigyn's Magic Shop we have just the items you need to help on your
'hunting' expeditions. Our patented magic stones will help you to find just the
right monsters for your abilities. Our handy compass will help you to find your
way back to the village when out hunting. Come on in and try us out. We're
located just to the north of the equipment shop.
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page 10 8
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(continued from page 7.)
Canticle: Last question, what does your name mean if anything ?
Zwr tells you: One question I don't wish to answer, I have several of my
friends trying to guess & don't wish to print it for everyone
to see. ;) If that is alright with you.
Canticle: Thank you for your time. Good adventuring.
--------------------------------------------------------------
The ABC's of Ancient Anguish Gossip! - Yes, these letters stand for the
first initial of someone's name ! Have fun trying to guess just who that
person might be ! :-)
A has joined AA after a hiatus of not playing the alt S.
B and C renounced men altogether and got married after B was stood up by I.
D helped out AA, see help donators.
E has reconciled with his ex-mud wife.
F married on several occasions, but is single for the time being after
her most recent divorce.
G this list is long!
H joined AA after a 3 month break because he doesn't have his own computer.
I is considering marriage to M; but she has to get a divorce from V first.
J married P after a divorce from C.
K is vigilantly searching for her cat.
L found a job performing mud-weddings.
M returned to AA after bugging the mess out of A.
N got a divorce from F.
O disappeared after being a rare healer of fingers.
P see also H!!!
Q there are no que's on AA.
R persists at losing at chess games.
S has decided to pick a gender on the guildline.
T has had law troubles, just ask Dibbs.
U is nervous about proposing to current party partner.
V now married for longer than a week to same person, but hasn't been
logged in since about that long ago!
W married, though no one seems to know to whom.
X has maintained his single life despite suitors of late.
Y because we like you.
Z the talk of AA and a good ranger-type.
You turn to page 11.
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Volume 2.0 Harvestmonth 01, 527 Page 11 8
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The Ancient Anguish Horoscope.
How to use it:
Pick the month that you first started to play and that is considered
the month of your birth. So if you first started to play in August of 1996, then
your birth month is August, which is Ancient Anguish times converts to
Virrsmonth and the sign of that month is the Crossed Swords. Have fun !
_________________
Month 1: Ansmonth - Sign: Candle Flame
You might expect to hear from a friend from the past, but be cautious
about extending your hand to help. Look to those you consider family to help
you with this problem.
Month 2: Fearmonth - Sign: Mighty Dragon
This month will go by very slowly - You will be slow to advance and slow
to earn wealth. Instead, you will be helpful to others and looked upon in times
of need. Around the middle of the month, you will help someone who later will
help you.
Month 3: Moonset Sign: Grey Werewolf
Your evil tendencies begin to show this month with the moon changes. Your
true werewolf self is harder to keep from emerging if you are a monk or another
good alignment. However, if you are evil such as a Scyther or Chaos member in
particular, this month will be prosperous.
Month 4: Evensend Sign: Swooping Hawk
The sign of Virrsmonth - Crossed Swords certainly takes a high place in
your life this month. You may meet someone of this sign or perhaps someone from
your past of this sign may come back into your life. Keep an eye out around the
10th day.
Month 5: Tuulneas Sign: Refreshing Spirit
This month concentrate on yourself. The more you care for yourself, the
more you can accomplish this month. Looking toward the end of the month you may
be coming into some wealth. Maybe by luck or possibly your skills. (Be they
legal or illegal)
Continued on Next Page.
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Month 6: Stormmonth Sign: Fierce Thunder
You have met your soul mate and your union will be blessed by those in
power. Put your faith in what you believe and enjoy being outdoors with that
special one you love. Everything is going smoothly. This is a very good month
for you.
Month 7: Waterhaze Sign: Rainbow Trout
The fish certainly is looking out for you in the wealth area of your life.
You will be quite lucky in finding coins and equipment left behind by others.
But do not get too greedy or it may come back to haunt you!
Month 8: Virrsmonth Sign: Crossed Swords
This is your month, Crossed Swords. You will meet a new friend and perhaps
a soulmate in the sign of the Swooping Hawk. Perhaps you will go off adventuring
together - or maybe even meet in a trivia game or in a pub. In any way,
Swooping Hawk may become a friend for a lifetime.
Month 9: Harvestmonth Sign: Golden Wheat
Your month has arrived and is in full swing! The changes in the weather may
be effecting your health. Try to keep yourself healthy by eating the right foods
and drinking the right drinks. Stay out of the pubs and cut down on those
firebreathers! Or maybe watch out for some of the Crone's healing potions being
sour! You want to stay strong for your adventuring.
Month 10: Nethory Sign: Whispering Pine
Your love life will blossom this month. Respect the love you have in your
relationships. Be cautious of those you fight or adventure with for backstabbing
and rumours may be running rampant. Trust only that one special someone and be
careful so no one will break you two up.
Month 11: Okeyeteen Sign: Brisk Wind
This is certainly not your month, Brisk Wind. You pretty much should take
this whole month off from any type of adventuring for bad luck follows wherever
you go. If you do not heed this warning, death may fall upon you. Take Heed !!
Month 12: Icemonth Sign: Arctic Fox
This is a good month for questing and practical thinking. If you have spent
much of your past time fighting and raising your skills - take this month and
consider trying to complete a quest. You may be surprised at how easy it may be
for you to succeed. Whatever you do, do not share your answers with a fellow
player!